What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
Last Updated: 17.06.2025 04:27
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
Have you ever witnessed a remote beach show where hundreds of turtles crawling to the water?
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
What is the best reply if your boyfriend asks you,"why do you love me?"
Make Nazis afraid again!
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
Are there many people here who suffer from schizophrenia?
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
What is the best sex you have ever had (in detail)?
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
I have BPD. Why do I destroy everyone I love?
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
Why would my husband cheat on me with an ugly fat woman?
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
TEXT:
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
What is your favourite colour and why?
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
What can you do if you are a full-grown adult, but never experienced being a child?
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
What is the difference between the terms "Millennials" and "kids"?
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority